Nonviolent Communication and Conflict Management
The conflict:
This happened last year, 2010. I was just moved from one classroom to the other to be the lead teacher. The same morning it was snowing and according to the policy regarding taking the kids outdoors we have to take the kids unless the temperature is under 32 degrees or the wind chill is high. That morning a parent came in saying that her child is not going outside before asking whether or not we were going outside. I immediately approached the parent reminding her of the policy. She got upset and cursed me out saying she was going to kick my…. You know what! One of the other teachers immediately reported the incident to the director and the parent was called in for a meeting. We discussed the issue but none of us admitted that we did or say something wrong. We argued over what was said and what was not said. No solution was reached and the situation was left hanging. The afternoon when she came to pick her child up from school we did not communicate and up to the time her child left for kindergarten I had very little to say to that parent.
The issue for the parent was that I am new and I should not act as if I was in charge trying to act “stand offish.” The issue for me was that she shouldn’t be telling us that her child was not going outside. The way she said it sounded demanding as if she was in control of what we do or not do in and out of the classroom.
Strategies
I could have used the escapist strategy; that is allowing the parent to have her way and make the decision to avoiding a conflict. This strategy would help avoid direct conflict between the parent and me. Direct conflict can ruin relationship between parties.
I could have also used the consider options and alternatives strategy by making her know what we can do with the child if we were going to go outdoors. I could have suggested dressing the child warmly by giving her the needed winter attire, or suggested that we can take the child to another classroom for the thirty (30) minutes. This strategy would help manage the conflict effectively.
This was a learning experience for me. If I had greater knowledge of conflict resolution as I have today maybe the conflict would have never occurred OR would have handled differently. The knowledge gained from this course on conflict resolution is now a roadmap in handling conflicts.
Resources
Theresa,
ReplyDeleteWow, you wrote such an amazing blog addressing the issue of the conflict between the parent and the teacher. You chose some great strategies such as the escaptist strategy which is allowing the parent to have her way and make the decision to avoid conflict. On the other hand, the choice to use the alternative strategy which the teacher could have told the parent about athe option of taking their child to another classroom or dress the child warmly. All of these of effective ways to handle conflicts.
Theresa,
ReplyDeleteWhat an experience. Everyday is a new day, and we learn something new about the children and the families that we serve or about our own selves most of the days. This perticular day was one of those special ones for you, it is still in your mind. With all the new information you are gaining through your education you see the situation in a new light now. Thank you for sharing.
Theresa,
ReplyDeleteAs have been said, conflict is inevitable but how we handle it is what makes the difference. It is indeed a learning experience and like the rest of us, I am sure you are much better equipped to deal more effectively with situations such as these. Thanks for sharing!